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Crown Jewels – Mean Girls Quotes

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Some movies are eminently quotable, and Mean Girls is definitely one of those movies. And since October 3rd, on which day Aaron Samuels asked what day it was, was this week, it’s high time to list the Crown Jewels of Mean Girls quotes and all the wonderful ways you can use them.

10. I have a fifth sense. It’s like I have ESPN or something.


When someone asks you, “How do you know that?” this Karen quote is a great way to get a laugh, whether or not the person who asks has seen Mean Girls.

9. You can’t just ask people why they’re white!


Opportunities to use this gem are rare, which only makes it that much more special when they appear. Be ready in discussions on racism, tanning, color theory, and clown makeup.

8. Stop trying to make fetch happen!


If your dog keeps bringing his favorite ball to you, wanting you to throw it, you’re now readily armed with a Mean Girls reply. Alternatively, “fetch” can be replaced with any word your friends use to an annoying extent.

7. You go, Glenn Coco!


Whenever your friend comes into a wave of good fortune, like a tax refund or a hot date or four (count ’em, four) candy cane-grams, you can use this line to compare him to that bastion of awesomeness, Glenn Coco.

6. One time she punched me in the face. It was awesome.


Want to end a bout of gossip among friends? Or want to contribute, but you’re low on stories? Throw this in for the crowning glory of juicy secrets. And also for a lot of weird stares.

5. That’s why her hair is so big. It’s full of secrets.


If the humidity is getting to your hair and upping the frizz factor, you could just say you’re having a bad hair day, OR you could say it’s full of secrets. Which do you think is going to get a better response?

4. Raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimized by Regina George.


This quote is great for any event which involves raising hands en masse. Simply yell it out and instantly find all your fellow Mean Girls enthusiasts in the audience as hands go up.

3. On Wednesdays, we wear pink.



Ever have trouble picking out an outfit on Wednesday? Let the rules of the P be your guide. And then repeat them whenever anyone compliments you on your clothing choice.

2. Get in, loser. We’re going shopping.


The perfect quote for picking up your friend for any event. Simply replace “shopping” with the participle of your choice. Swimming, baking, time-traveling, you name it.

1. She doesn’t even go here!


Shout this out at any graduation, award ceremony, or other name-calling event where you want to embarrass your friends. NOTE: Please use discretion; don’t do it if it’ll get you or your friends in trouble, and don’t say it so often it gets annoying. But used with proper respect and humor, this is one of the greatest Mean Girls quotes you can use.


Did I miss any of your favorite quotes? What’s your favorite quotable movie? Put them in the comments below, and there’s a 30% chance that I’ll know what they are after I see them.


Mean Girls is owned by Paramount Pictures.


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